The Shenoa Report Regular Season Week 6 '16

The Shenoa Report

October 13, 2016

Regular Season Week 6

I finally have a winning record in picks (8-6), I annihilated my opponent in fantasy, but the Giants lost again.  We are a quarter of the way through the season and I still feel like I’m trying to figure all these teams out. I mean, the Raiders are 4-1 and the Panthers are 1-4, the 2016 season is an interesting one, I’ll say.  Week six should be a good one. Hey, maybe the Giants will even win! I’m not going to hold my breath.

Let’s recap week five.

Cardinals @ 49ers 33-21

It seems like the Thursday night games are always ugly, and this one was no different. I’m not gonna lie, I didn’t watch this entire game. I fell asleep in the 3^rd quarter, which has become a ritual for Thursday night football, Sunday night football, and Monday night football. I’m old.

Patriots @ Browns 33-13

This game pissed me off so much! Whenever I start Martellus Bennett he might have 3 touches during the game, when I bench him 3 TOUCHDOWNS!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH! 

Titans @ Dolphins 30-17

The Titans won their second game of the season, hopefully that won’t be their last.

Eagles @ Lions 23-24

I’m not even mad that the Lions messed up my picks! Good game Detroit!!!!!!

Bears @ Colts 23-29

The Colts squeaked that one out, or the Bears fell apart, or both.  

Texans @ Vikings 13-31

 Ok, ok, the Vikings are good.  

Redskins @ Ravens 16-10

Dammit Ravens, just for that I hope you lose next week too!

Jets @ Steelers 13-31

How did the Jets get to be so bad?

Falcons @ Broncos 23-16

Holy Falcons batman! Damn. I did NOT see that one coming.  

Bengals @ Cowboys 14-28

Stupid Bengals. I can’t wait for Romo to come back so the Cowboys can start losing again.

Bills @ Rams 30-19

The Bills stun again, seriously, as soon as I start picking them to win, they’ll lose.

Chargers @ Raiders 31-34

The Raiders are 4-1. Say whaaaa?!

NY Giants @ Packers 16-23

Dear Giants, you didn’t prove me wrong. You looked horrible. You should be ashamed of yourselves. Thanks for the false hope at the end of the game with the OBJ touchdown. You make my heart hurt. Love, Shenoa.

Buccaneers @ Panthers 17-14

This game was so sloppy. I really can’t comment on it too much because it was so boring I fell asleep around half time. I was surprised to wake up Tuesday morning and see that the Panthers had lost, again. Ouch. Sorry Carolina, maybe drink lots of Gatorade for that Super Bowl hangover you’re still struggling to get over.

WEEK 6

I’m going to try to do these picks without my heart getting in the way this week…

Thursday, October 13^th

Broncos (4-1) @ Chargers (1-4) [8:25pm CBS, NFLN]

I’m picking the Broncos

Sunday, October 16^th  

49ers (1-4) @ Bills (3-2) [1:00pm FOX]

Kaepernick is starting this game for the 49ers, so I’m picking the Bills to win.

Eagles (3-1) @ Redskins (3-2) [1pm FOX]

I hope this game ends in a tie. I’m picking the Redskins to win, but really, I hope it ends in a tie.

Browns (0-5) @ Titans (2-3)  [1pm CBS]

I’m picking the Titans to win.

Ravens (3-2) @ NY Giants (2-3) [1pm CBS]

I’m picking the Ravens to win in hopes that the Giants will actually show up, not make STUPID MISTAKES, and actually pull off a win. But until they actually win a game I’m picking against them. Love you Gmen.

Panthers (1-4) @ Saints (1-3) [1pm FOX]

I’m picking the Saints, sorry Panthers fans.

Jaguars (1-3) @ Bears (1-4) [1pm CBS]

I’m picking the Bears, only because they are at home.

Rams (3-2) @ Lions (2-3) [1pm FOX]

I’m picking the Rams. I’d like to pick the Lions but whenever I do, they lose.

Steelers (4-1) @ Dolphins (1-4) [1pm CBS]

I’m taking the Steelers over the Dolphins.

Bengals (2-3) @ Patriots (4-1) [1pm CBS]

 I’m picking the Patriots.

Chiefs (2-2) @ Raiders (4-1) [4:05pm CBS]

 I’m taking the Raiders over the Chiefs.

Falcons (4-1) @ Seahawks (3-1) [4:25pm FOX]

I was going to pick the Falcons to win but Julio Jones is listed as questionable, so I’m going with the Seahawks.

Cowboys (4-1) @ Packers (3-1) [4:25pm FOX]

I’m picking the Packers to win.

Colts (2-3) @ Texans (3-2) [8:30pm NBC]

I’m picking the Texans at home.

Monday, October 17^th

Jets (1-4) @ Cardinals (2-3) [8:30pm ESPN]

I’m going with the Cardinals.

BYE: Vikings, Buccaneers

GO GMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the edit Eric!